Nov. 20th, 2010

History?

Nov. 20th, 2010 02:00 pm
pierianspring: A photo of myself. (Default)
Friday we had a quiz in History. I had not read the chapter that the quiz was over, but still managed to make a 100 on the quiz. Dr. Heath looked through our quizzes and was calling out people who had done well. To the others he would say "Good job!" and small things like that. But when he got to mine, he looked up at me and said "Oh, Amanda. I hope you come to graduate school here with me! You don't have to study Latin America!" (his specialty). 

He was only joking a little bit. We have talked about me maybe going for an M.A. in History here before, on visits to his office. He does want me to and is willing to recommend me, but I think he is mistaking my shyness as ambivalence. Like I don't really want to, but I'm being nice about it. Actually I don't know if I want to or not. I'm thinking about emailing him, and seeing if I can come in and talk about it more in depth or something. I'm so torn right now. I feel like I could go in any direction, but Dr. Heath is the first professor who has really recognized any talent in me or supported me. He has become something of a mentor, even though my major is psychology. The psychology department is completely overwhelmed with students, both undergraduate and graduate level. The classes are enormous, and the professors are too busy to meet with people individually much of the time. So I don't know them well and they don't know me. I feel detached from psychology now. I know enough about it to realize how much I don't know. I can't believe I'm about to graduate with a degree in Psychology with how little I actually KNOW about psychology. . Maybe I'm selling myself short.

Anyway, History is more enjoyable to me. Honestly this is not Psychology vs. History, but History vs. Library Science. I wonder if I could just apply to History programs and Library programs. I mean, is it sort of an unspoken rule that you only choose one field and only apply to graduate schools that are in that one field? It seems like when people go through the application process they are already sure of what they want to do. I wonder if that is actually true, or if it is only how it seems. 

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Amanda

January 2011

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